When it comes to being a man, and running your very own bachelor pad, there are a few key elements one must have in order to ensure testosterone levels are consistently running on high.
After you’ve acquired the leather couch, big screen TV, the cappuccino furniture and numerous stylish pieces of fine art there is only one thing left to buy; a love making rug. If you are a real man, you’ve already ripped up the carpeting in your house and replaced it with ultra manly hardwood flooring, so a love making rug is a must unless you plan on wearing knee pads during your copulation sessions. You could hit Ikea and buy yourself a run of the mill area rug that does nothing but tell the world how boring you are in the sack, or you could turn to the Internet to find yourself the real live fur of an animal to spruce your place up.
Nothing spells man quite like the fur of a dead animal resting peacefully in front of your fireplace. Light a few candles, put on some slow music, dim the lights and break out the strawberries with champagne; provided you have a real live female at your place love making will ensue.
Arctic White Wolf Rug
While I’m sure it is the dream of every Native American girl to make love on the back of a beautiful Arctic White Wolf, it is fairly unlikely that two American people would be able to fit on top of this furry K9 unless the two of you were as skinny as Victoria Beckham. If you are skinny enough to fit on a wolf skin and your typical love making sessions are more like playing a game of knuckles with your pelvis, then this rug just might be for you.
Zebra Skin Rug
While I’m not sure of the comfort factor that would go alongside humping on the fur of a bristly zebra I will admit that it would definitely be some thing to put on your long list of accomplishments. With a price tag over $2000, a Zebra Skin rug might just be a rental rug.
Elmo Rug
I’ve heard that Elmo’s are an endangered species, so getting your hands on an authentic Elmo skin rug might cost you a small fortune. Rest assured that Elmo fur is the softest fur of any animal walking this planet and that any love making sessions on such a rug will never be forgotten by either party. If you or your partner has a Sesame Street fetish, you better believe you will set the night on fire with this piece of floor art.
Sheepskin rugs
While Sheepskin rugs might not be the most expensive or the most ‘Manliest’ per say, they probably provide the most comfort for both parties. What is nice about sheepskin rugs is that the fur is extremely soft and has very good air circulation, so you don’t wind up turning your rug into a sweaty mess after a two hour long copulation session. Ideally, you should have an octo Sheepksin rug in front of your fireplace to make up for the fact that you bought the cheaper rug.
Grizzly Bear Rug
While a Grizzly Bear rug is a beautiful addition to any love making moments, it doesn’t usually provide any contrast if you setup your man cave correctly. Most man caves will consist of a dark hardwood and the Grizzly bear rug has a tendency to kind of blend in. While most people will say a Grizzly Bear rug is the poor man’s version of the Polar Bear rug, I have to give it one major benefit…. Stains. The dark colored fur of the Grizzley bear covers up messes that occur dung your late night activities.
Polar Bear Rug
One of the manliest rugs one can own is that of a Polar Bear. Authentic Polar Bear rugs start at prices close to the $8000 mark, but chalk it up as a love making investment. If you play your cards right with this 7 foot plus beast rug, you will have made that investment back in a matter of months.
So there you have it, the six top rugs to make sweet sweet love on. If you are married, save your money for something else, because chances are you aren’t getting it any more anyways. One word of advice though, before bringing any ladies back to your house for extracurricular actives, make sure they aren’t PETA members.
{ 0 comments }
